We all know there is danger involved with being a respected leader.
We admire people who lead their teams the right way and deliver results. But sadly others strongly oppose them.
The resistance to leaders with high morals and integrity is often fueled by bad motives. Envy. Greed. Jealousy.
The list of reasons good leaders face opposition is as long as the list of opponents seeking to derail them.
Experienced leaders expect this.
But what if I told you the people you lead, the team members who trust and admire you, are also a source of danger when you are a respected leader?
And, what if I told you they are a danger not because of their unscrupulous motives but because of their good intentions?
You might be surprised. And, that’s why the risk is so high.
I want to help you recognize this hidden trap and avoid it.
You need to be prepared to protect yourself and your team from this very real danger of being a respected leader.
The danger that comes with respect
Think of a leader you respect. Someone you admire.
Do you have a person in mind?
You observe how they lead teams. I expect they care for their people and help them deliver results.
If you’re like me, you watch what they do. You pay attention to what works for them. Their strategies. Their techniques.
Then, as you lead teams, you apply what you’ve learned from them. You do what they do.
The same is true for those who look up to you as a model of good leadership.
The people you lead do what you do. And, that is the hidden danger of being a respected leader.
A well hidden trap
When your teammates, those who report to you or your peers, model your behavior out of respect and admiration, it speaks highly of you. It means you are leading well. You’re doing it right.
And, that’s a very good thing. But, the natural response to emulate good leaders is also hidden trap. A danger for you as the leader and for the team members themselves.
Because the danger is subtle and cloaked within good intentions it’s easy to miss.
We would not normally expect that having people do what we do as their leader would be a risk to us and to them.
It just isn’t obvious at first.
That’s why we need to be aware and alert to avoid this danger when we are a respected leader.
An effective trap
Just like any effective trap, you don’t see it until you’re in it and you can’t get out. And, traps almost always bring bad things for those who are ensnared.
With this particular trap, the danger of being a respected leader is not just to you as the leader but to those who are following in your foot steps as well. The negative impact of this subtle snare may not be seen immediately, but it has the potential to bring great harm to you and your team in the long run.
I know that as a reader of this blog, you are striving to be a kind and confident leader. You don’t want to do anything that might damage your team or your organization. Now or in the future.
So, let’s examine the details of the danger your team is introducing to you and themselves by doing what you do.
With this insight, you can still be an admired and emulated leader and you will be equipped to spot and avoid the pitfalls waiting for you and your team.
I’m going to create separate posts in my blog to cover the many risks associated with the dangers you will encounter as a respected leader. I’ll give you tips and strategies to identifying and manage each risk.
In this post, we’ll start with a danger that doesn’t seem dangerous at all.
In fact, it feels quite comfortable.
Keeping you in your comfort zone
If you want to grow as a leader, you must be uncomfortable at times. Growth comes through discomfort.
But, when the people on your team are doing things the way you would do them, you’re going to feel comfortable.
Comfortable isn’t as good as it feels
For example, the report you receive from them is going to be familiar when it’s in the exact format you prefer.
You will feel a sense of reassurance when you attend a meeting and your teammate is leading it just like you would.
One of your mentees (yes, that’s a word even though it feels awkward to me every time I use it) builds a team with people you would have picked if you were in charge.
Aaahhhh. It’s like snuggling up next to the fireplace with a cup of hot cocoa. Soooo comfortable.
And so dangerous.
We all crave comfort
The familiarity that comes with your teammates doing things just like you would do them makes this trap particularly sneaky.
Obviously, the way you do things is effective. You are a good leader. Maybe even a great leader.
The results of your techniques have caused others to follow your example. They may be on your team and delivering results that are just as good as you would have produced using your trusted methods.
They may be maintaining the status quo, but their imitation of your preferred techniques isn’t making you better.
It’s just making you comfortable.
I have not yet read the book, “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful” by Marshall Goldsmith, but it’s referenced in one of my most trusted resources, “Your Leadership Edge: Lead Anytime, Anywhere” by Ed O’Malley and Amanda Cebula of The Kansas Leadership Center.
In the chapter Experiment Beyond Your Comfort Zone, my friends Ed and Amanda write this.
This should be obvious, but experimenting beyond your comfort zone will mean you are uncomfortable. Our default is comfort. We crave it. Our lives revolve around routines. Leadership requires you to resist the human urge for comfort.”
Your Leadership Edge: Lead Anytime, Anywhere
When you are surrounded by teammates who are doing things “your way”, you are likely to be in your comfort zone. Which means you are likely to not be growing or leading as well as you are capable of leading.
I encourage you to exercise leadership as Ed and Amanda suggest.
Resist the human urge for comfort.
How to avoid this danger of being a respected leader
To avoid becoming stuck and stagnant in your comfort zone, try these approaches with your team.
Encourage something to be done in a new way
If you recognize your team is consistently using a format or a method you created or even requested, encourage them to try a new approach.
You might say something like this.
We’ve been using this scorecard to monitor our results for quite a while now. It seems effective and I like it. In fact, I think I may have asked the team to use this format. But, I’m wondering if we can be more effective with a different approach. Does anyone have any suggestions for a better way to track our progress?
The ideas your admirers have been keeping to themselves out of respect for you as their leader may amaze you.
They probably have a number of innovative ways to build on the strong foundation you’ve laid for them, but just haven’t shared them with you.
By inviting them to try an approach different than yours, you will unleash the creative energy of your team.
With their new ideas and the confidence you give them by asking for their input, your team will probably produce greater results than they’ve ever delivered in the past.
After you see the benefits of this technique, you’ll have more courage to take another step out of your comfort zone. A step that is just a bit more intimidating.
Invite actions that may make you uncomfortable
This can be scary, but if you want to grow as a leader, try inviting your team to make you uncomfortable.
That’s right. Ask them to introduce discomfort into your life.
You can start by saying something like this to them.
I’ve been feeling pretty comfortable lately with how our team is working together. That may be because we’re doing things the way I like to have them done. But, I don’t want to sit in my comfort zone and miss opportunities to get better. Does anyone have any recommendations you’ve been wanting to make but didn’t share them because you were concerned I might not agree with your suggestions? If you do, I want to hear them. I want to grow as a leader so make me uncomfortable. You have my permission.
I said this can be scary, because delivering an invitation like this to your team requires you to be vulnerable with them. You are saying out loud that you are not perfect.
It requires you to trust them.
And, trusting people can be scary. Frightening even.
When you suggest your team members may have been afraid to tell you something, you are admitting you might not have a healthy relationship with them.
If they don’t feel completely comfortable sharing their honest input with you, you may have an environment in which your team members don’t fully trust you.
When this is the case, they likely don’t trust one another either. I’m confident this isn’t the dynamic you want with your team.
A humble statement like the one above from you, their leader, is a powerful first step to building an culture of vulnerability, transparency, and trust in your organization.
The comments from your team may be hard for you to hear and perhaps even harder for them to say initially.
With time, however, these authentic dialogues will become easier and the trust between teammates will grow.
One danger of many
Keeping you in your comfort zone is only one of the dangers of being a respected leader. There are many other risks that are even more concerning.
But, don’t let this discourage you on you quest to becoming a kinder and more confident leader.
As we outlined here with the danger of getting stuck in your comfort zone, there are ways to recognize the other dangers and address them proactively.
With an increased awareness and a little training and preparation, you will avoid the risks your well-intentioned followers introduce to you and your team.
Ironically, you will show them the behavior to model so they can also avoid these dangers when they are respected by their own team members.
Let’s lead with kindness and confidence.
Greg
Discussion Questions
- What techniques do you use to recognize when you are stuck in your comfort zone?
- How do you keep yourself uncomfortable and growing as a leader?
I’m eager to learn your strategies and techniques for being a kind and confident leader. Please share your experiences in the comments section so we can benefit from your experience and wisdom.
