I was in the university welding shop when my boss asked me that.

He had more years of experience than I’d been alive and I still had a lot to learn. But the answer to that question seemed pretty obvious to me.

I had a push broom in my hands, and I was using it to transfer dirt from one location of the concrete floor to another. Perhaps he wasn’t aware that I had also masterminded a plan to later move that collected dirt into a dustpan and then into the trash can.

Was I missing something? Or was this a trick question for the new kid?

This was one of the two jobs I had while going to summer school before I started my first fall co-op term with Caterpillar. The other was doing MATLAB programming for one of my professors in his air-conditioned office.

Neither of these were anything like what I had done to make money during all my summers up to that point.

I started mowing yards with my mom when I was 10 and then switched to working for my dad in his welding shop when I was 14. (Thanks, Mom, for teaching me how to work hard and run a business at an early age.)

Air conditioning had never been a part of either of those jobs.

But I thought this welding shop would be very similar to working at my folks’.

Turns out I was wrong.

My first clue should have been the route my coworker drove to get from one side of the campus to the other.

We needed to do some repair work in a tunnel below the campus, and it couldn’t have been more than a 3-minute walk from the shop.

It made sense to take a truck since it had all the equipment we needed.

But here’s the part that was completely new to me.

My coworker took the scenic route. So it took us FOREVER to get to where we were supposed to be working.

At the time, Manhattan wasn’t as big as it is now. And, to clarify, I mean the Little Apple not the Big Apple. Kansas, not New York. It’s an easy mistake to make. Just as the Boeing recruiter who sent me airline tickets departing from La Guardia… but that’s a story for another time.

But as long as it took us, you would have thought we were fighting New York City traffic.

If you knew how my dad worked and what he expected of his employees, you would know why this shocked me.

I can still remember him taking me aside one day after I had been standing by him to listen in on a conversation he was having with a customer. He very clearly explained to me that I was being paid to work not to stand there.

Obviously, my new teammates at the welding shop, including my boss, had never worked for my dad.

Because here’s what happened between my boss and me just before I started sweeping.

I arrived for my shift and asked him what he wanted me to do that day.

He said, “Nothing.”

That’s where the miscommunication occurred.

I suppose it was the echo of these words I’d heard from Mom and Dad more times than I can count that caused me to misinterpret his directive and drove me to cleaning.

“You can always find something to do.”

It was a natural reaction for me to start picking up welding rod ends, stacking scrap metal, and sweeping the floor.

So that’s what I did.

Until my boss explained to me that what he wanted me to do was to sit down beside him at his desk while he read the newspaper.

He wanted me to do what he was doing: NOTHING!

Not clean.
Not study for my Matrix Theory exam.
Not optimize the driving route for the next job.

He didn’t want me to do anything productive.

Even though MY tuition payments were funding both of our wages.

I can’t remember one thing I learned in Matrix Theory that summer, but I can remember this experience like it was yesterday.

So why am I sharing this story with you?

I’m convinced that you want the people on your team to do meaningful work. And the people you’ve hired want to add value by applying the talents they were born with and the skills they’ve developed.

It would be easy to read about my experience in the welding shop during college and miss an important leadership lesson.

We might assume the guys I worked with were lazy. Or that state government jobs are filled with wasteful practices. Or that organizations in the ‘80s hadn’t yet been forced to get lean and efficient.

I’ll admit it’s also quite possible that I have a completely inaccurate memory and interpretation of the incident now that I know that the frontal lobe of my brain wasn’t fully developed at that age.

That little tidbit of human anatomy knowledge explains a lot, doesn’t it?

So all of those speculations may or may not be true. But they’re not the point.

The point is that I’ve seen versions of this happen throughout my career.

They just weren’t as blatant about it.

These high-level leaders didn’t tell their people to “do nothing.” But their actions caused the same response in their people as it did in me.

I can recall dozens of conversations when excellent employees said, “I’m just not very busy.” Those were their words, not mine.

They wanted to do more and talked to their supervisor about it, but they still weren’t being challenged.

So they dreaded coming to work because they knew they would be underutilized.

Not only were they bored, but they also felt nagging guilt.

Because just like me and my welding shop boss that summer, they were still being paid a full paycheck whether they were fully utilized or not.

And that didn’t match up with who they were and how they’d been raised.

One situation still pains me to think about.

A talented, highly-motivated young man was performing well and meeting expectations, but he wasn’t given enough meaningful work to do.

This was obvious to the people around him because he was openly looking for ways to contribute more. He was constantly asking for opportunities to do work beyond what his official job description required.

And it wasn’t that he was in a department that had too many people or supporting a product that was reaching the end of its life.

The project he was on was one of the biggest in the company’s history and behind schedule. There was more than enough work to do.

Eventually, his boss acknowledged that there was a problem. But it was too late.

He left the company.

And the cost in time and money to replace him added even more pressure to this high-visibility project.

Unfortunately, this is just one of too many similar stories I could share with you.

But I won’t.

Instead, I’ll share this bit of advice that was shared with me and a few of my recommendations based on having the privilege of leading some incredible people.

This is the leadership advice that was shared with me:

“Don’t hire Ferraris and just let them sit there idling.”

The application of that simple tip is obvious.

Leaders often assume people leave because they’re overworked. Sometimes they leave because they’re underchallenged.

When you’ve got high-performing, highly motivated people on your team, do all you can to let them do what they’re made to do.

Give them work that challenges them.

Learn what energizes them, what they’re naturally good at, and then give them opportunities to use those strengths.

Create a culture that makes it easy for them to tell you when they don’t have enough work.

Look for projects that are missing skills your people have. Then position them to fill those gaps.

Years from now, the people who report to you may still remember the assignments you gave them. What story do you want them to tell?

I’m confident they’re going to talk about how you were the leader that gave them tasks that challenged them, energized them, and allowed them to make a significant impact on your business by doing what they were built to do.

And that’s a legacy you can be proud of.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

P.S. If this newsletter resonated with you, let’s talk. If you feel like everything still depends on you, I’d love to help you develop your people so your business can grow. I’ve opened a few complimentary 45-minute coaching sessions over the next couple of weeks. You can reserve one here using my scheduling link.

P.P.S. I recently had the privilege of joining Dave Crysler on the Crysler Club podcast. We had a great discussion about why your most reliable employees are often the closest to burnout and what leaders can do to prevent it. You can listen to our conversation here.

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post Don’t Let Your Ferraris Sit There Idling appeared first on Greg Harrod.

Now it may sound ridiculous to suggest that parts of speech are a critical aspect of developing your people and building an effective team but hear me out.

To be clear, I don’t have anything against nouns, pronouns, adjectives, or adverbs. Prepositions, participles, and gerunds are fine too. To be honest, I’m guessing about gerunds because I can’t remember what those are, but I’m sure they serve a worthwhile purpose in the English language. (Coach Skillen, I know you’re reading this right now and rolling your eyes because I’m sure you taught me this, but please forgive me.)

So why do verbs deserve a business leader’s attention?

Well, a million years ago when I was in grade school, I was taught that a verb is the “doing” word.

And work is about doing things. Taking action.

When people are on a team in a business, or any type of organization for that matter, their purpose is to accomplish tasks.

Businesses are built on two things: people and verbs.

People taking action.

The better you are at using verbs, the better leader you will be.

When you clearly articulate the work you expect someone to do, they will be more successful.

To illustrate my point, here’s a story based loosely on some work I was doing recently with a client.

I’ll call him Chuck and fuzzy up the details to protect his privacy.

Chuck was preparing to hire a new team member. And I was reviewing a draft of the job posting. This is one of my favorite things to do with clients, so I was really digging into it.

Chuck’s got a small team, so adding one more person is a big deal. If he gets it right, his business will benefit greatly. But, if he makes a bad hire, the negative impact will be even bigger.

He’ll waste time and money with firing and rehiring and potentially disturb the high level of trust and cohesion he’s built within his team.

That’s why I was involved.

When I studied the first revision of the job posting Chuck shared with me, I paid close attention to the verbs he used.

I did that for two reasons.

First, I wanted to make sure that any job seeker reading the posting would immediately know if they were a good fit. If they were, they would apply. If they weren’t, they would move on and save everyone time.

Second, I wanted to help Chuck think at a deeper level about this role and communicate more clearly.

Here’s what happened.

Chuck used the verb “own” multiple times to describe the responsibilities of the person in this role.

“Own” is a good verb.

We all want people on our team who “think like an owner,” and good leaders hire people who have an owner’s mindset.

But what does “own” really mean?

That’s what Chuck and I discussed.

As we were talking, I reminded Chuck about the Working Genius principles.

Every person has only two Working Geniuses, which represent the types of tasks they enjoy doing and bring them energy and fulfillment.

And every project requires all six Working Geniuses to be applied.

Therefore, every project is best done by a team with a diverse set of Working Geniuses.

Can one person do a project all by themselves?

Sure they can. But they’re going to be frustrated and not working at their full potential most of the time.

That may be acceptable for some leaders. But it wasn’t for Chuck.

He’s committed to providing his employees with work that brings them fulfillment.

In fact, it’s one of the core values of his business.

Chuck works hard to understand his people and give them work that lights them up.

Which brings us back to the verb he was using in his job posting.

“Own.”

Chuck and I decided this verb was good, but not good enough.

Because this vague action doesn’t really capture the specific tasks Chuck has in mind for this person.

Own could mean this one employee has to personally do every task from the start of the project until it was completed. By themselves.

Since Chuck has such a small staff, this is a reasonable interpretation. But that would be a disaster waiting to happen. And it wasn’t what Chuck meant.

No one person should be expected to be good at and enjoy every aspect of a project from start to finish.

Take a minute to think about yourself. Are you wired to do all these steps well?

• Identify the need for improvement or a change.
• Generate several creative ideas and solutions.
• Evaluate them and decide which one is best.
• Get the work started and keep it moving.
• Help others who need to be involved.
• Drive the project to done.

I’m not. Neither is Chuck.

And when he used the word “own,” he didn’t mean that he expected one person to be fully responsible for all the tasks that needed to be done for the project.

But through our discussions, he realized that a potential candidate could get that impression from the job posting as he first wrote it.

Chuck knew he needed to use a different verb. Several of them actually.

For context, this is the situation he and his team were in.

Last year, they recognized a business opportunity, and the team came up with several innovative approaches they wanted to consider.

The ideation phase of this project was done.

They had also evaluated and selected the process they wanted to use. Then they developed a playbook for the team to follow.

They had a kickoff meeting and everyone was excited to get started.

Activation phase of the work: complete!

But that’s when progress stalled.

They just couldn’t seem to get this new initiative to move beyond the excitement of the initial launch. As a result, it wasn’t yet delivering the results they knew it could.

This project was stuck in the implementation phase.

That’s why Chuck was adding a person to his team. And that’s what he meant when he used the word “own.”

So, we worked together to tighten up his verbs.

Here are some of the options we discussed.

• Track deadlines
• Manage timelines
• Remove obstacles
• Drive accountability
• Facilitate collaboration
• Conduct status reviews
• Measure results after launch
• Ensure quality standards are met

That’s what Chuck really meant by “own.”

In the language of the Working Genius model, he needed someone on his team with Enablement and Tenacity.

Which, not coincidentally, is the gap his Working Genius team map highlights.

With just a short coaching conversation, Chuck was able to more clearly articulate what he was really looking for in candidates for this role before he posted it publicly.

As a result, he saved himself hours that would have been wasted interviewing candidates who could “own” parts of the project but weren’t who Chuck needed on his team.

The time he spent thinking about verbs was valuable for Chuck.

You may not be writing a job posting to hire a new person on your team, but you’re using verbs every day as you lead your team.

Do the verbs you’re using clearly communicate what you really want?

I encourage you to do what Chuck did and consider tightening up your verbs.

The more clearly you articulate your desires and intentions, the more successful your team will be.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

P.S. If you’d like some help thinking through the verbs you’re using as a leader in your business, I’d love to support you. Feel free to grab a spot on my calendar using my scheduling link.

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post Why Business Leaders Should Focus on Verbs appeared first on Greg Harrod.

The Light Bulb Moment

The look in her eye told the whole story.

I didn’t see it but my wife, Kiersten, did.

I was coaching a young couple at our dining room table. They’re longtime friends of ours from church so Kiersten was there with us.

This couple had recently started a business together.

I was walking them through their two-person Working Genius team map when she had a “light bulb moment.”

She suddenly realized that his probing questions about her ideas weren’t negative criticisms.

She saw for the first time that he wasn’t just being “a wet blanket” when they talked about the new things she wanted to do in their business.

He was thinking deeply about what she shared with him.

His mental gears were turning as he considered how to implement her dreams.

He was trying to move the work forward, but she felt shut down.

She didn’t know what was going on inside his brain, and he wasn’t able to explain it.

The Difference Wasn’t the Problem

They were both eager to turn her ideas into reality.

But he’s wired to evaluate before implementing.

She, on the other hand, would prefer to skip that step and act immediately.

Together they made a great team.

But until that point, they didn’t see their differences as an asset.

They were a constant source of conflict.

One simple conversation changed their business relationship.

More importantly, it changed their marriage.

A New Level of Respect

Here’s how she described the shift.

She used to be frustrated and annoyed by his natural tendencies. But once she understood him better, she saw him with a new level of respect.

I’ve seen that exact scenario repeated over and over.

The Working Genius model not only improves relationships within businesses.

It transforms marriages.

“I Get My Husband Now”

I know that’s true from my own marriage and from coaching other couples.

And the creators of the Six Types of Working Genius agree.

Pat Lencioni regularly talks about people who come up to him after a presentation and tell him they didn’t think their spouse even liked them, but now they realize it was simply a difference in Working Geniuses.

He even had a woman tell him this.

“I think you just saved my marriage. Because it was kind of on the rocks and I get my husband now and I can’t wait to go home and talk about this.”

Wow.

That’s powerful.

An Hour Well Spent

I’m sure you know as well as I do how devastating and damaging a broken marriage can be.

Being married is hard.

Building a strong marriage takes work.

And you’ve got to continually invest to keep your relationship with your spouse healthy.

So, if you’re married, I’m going to encourage you to invest an hour of your time in your marriage this week.

If you’re not married, I’m going to ask you to make the same investment because I’m confident you have someone in your life who’s important to you and is either married or might be married someday.

And, as a leader, you have an opportunity to support them.

My Recommendation This Week

Here’s what I’m encouraging you to do this week.

Attend this live webinar on Thursday.

It’s titled, “Why Your Spouse Acts That Way”

You can register by clicking here or on the image above.

Pat Lencioni and his wife, Laura, will be doing this webinar along with Cody Thompson and his wife, Lindsey, and others.

Pat and Cody host the Working Genius podcast, and their conversations are always enjoyable and helpful to listen to. I have no doubt they’ll be just as engaging with their wives during this event.

In the first couple of minutes of this episode of the podcast, you can hear them describe the webinar and why they’re doing it.
Click here to watch it.

One More Thing

The rest of this episode is really good too.

In fact, I’ve shared it with several leaders who are building their leadership teams.

Pat and Cody explore this question:

“What would change if your team focused more on talents than job descriptions?”

They talk about why leadership roles cannot be reduced to generic titles or one-size-fits-all job descriptions.

So, if you have an extra 22 minutes to invest this week, watching this episode is a good way to use it.

But, if you only have an hour, don’t miss the Working Genius marriage webinar.

I’m confident you will benefit from it whether you’re married or not.

Let me know what you think about it after you watch it.

If you attend, send me an email and tell me what stood out to you. Or schedule a call and we can compare notes.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

P.S. Here’s the link to register for the Working Genius Marriage webinar. It’s this Thursday so sign up now so it’s on your calendar. And, share this email with your spouse and friends so they can join too!

If you’d like to see any of my previous newsletter issues, you can find them here along with other articles. And, if you’re not getting my weekly newsletter and would like to, just enter your info here.

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post The Conversation That Changed Their Marriage appeared first on Greg Harrod.

As I was depositing itch oil on my arms, I was putting something helpful in my ears. (Thankfully!)

I was listening to an episode of The Nathan Barry Show and Bryan Harris, founder of Growth Tools, told a story that got my attention.

He was recommending a book called Stop Guessing by Nat Greene and sharing one of the examples Greene uses to teach problem solving.

The story has stuck with me since then. So has the itching on my arms.

A $15 Million Problem

A paper products manufacturer had a problem.

A big one.

Their marketing team had introduced a new product that customers loved, and demand took off.

Unfortunately, production couldn’t keep up.

The bottleneck was a packaging machine.

Whenever operators tried to increase the machine speed beyond a certain point, everything went wrong. Packages tore. Product flew off the line. Production slowed to a crawl.

As I’m listening to this story, it sounds very familiar. I’ve been a part of more than a few situations that involved chasing an elusive problem that wasn’t exposed until we ramped up production rates.

Just like we did, that company was trying everything they could think of to keep customer shipments flowing.

They were running extra shifts.

People were working overtime.

Engineers were involved.

Consultants were hired.

Cross-functional teams were formed.

Expensive solutions were being proposed.

Some of the recommendations would have required significant modifications to the facility and millions of dollars of investment.

Everyone was focused on solving what appeared to be a highly complex problem.

Then one night, a maintenance technician did something simple.

He positioned himself so he could look down into the machine from the top.

And he watched it run.

Not at its normal operating speed.

At full speed.

As he watched, he noticed something moving inside.

Eventually, he shut the machine down, removed a panel, reached inside, and pulled out a small bolt.

That’s it.

A bolt.

Somehow it had found its way into the machine.

At lower speeds, it caused no issues.

At higher speeds, it would catch the packaging material and create chaos.

The company was preparing for a multi-million-dollar solution.

The actual problem was a bolt that cost less than a dollar.

One phrase from Nat Greene’s book stood out to me:

“Refuse complex solutions.”

The More I Thought About It…

The more I reflected on that story, the more it reminded me of leadership.

Because most leadership problems don’t arrive labeled with their root cause.

They show up as symptoms.

A leader tells me:

“We have communication problems.”

Another says:

“My team isn’t taking enough ownership.”

Someone else says:

“I’m involved in too many decisions.”

Or:

“People keep bringing me problems they should be able to solve themselves.”

Those problems are real.

The frustration is real.

The consequences are real.

But I’ve become increasingly convinced that many of those challenges are symptoms rather than root causes.

Finding the Bolt

One of the themes I’ve noticed in my conversations with business leaders is that we often jump to solutions before we truly understand the problem.

I’ve done it myself.

We change processes.

Redesign meetings.

Add more structure.

Implement new reporting systems.

Create accountability mechanisms.

Invest in better technology and tools.

And sometimes those things help.

But sometimes we’re spending thousands of dollars, hundreds of hours, and enormous amounts of energy trying to solve a 50-cent problem.

What I’ve observed is that many leadership challenges stem from something deeper.

In my experience, one of the most common root causes is surprisingly simple.

The leader has not yet learned how to consistently develop people and build ownership.

It’s not because they’re bad leaders and it’s rarely because they don’t care.

Usually, they’re struggling because no one taught them how.

Most leaders were promoted because they were good at solving problems.

Not because they were experts at developing others.

So they continue doing what made them successful.

They answer questions.

Solve problems.

Make decisions.

Rescue projects.

Step in when things get uncomfortable.

And over time, their team becomes increasingly dependent on them.

The leader becomes the bottleneck.

Not intentionally.

But predictably.

A Better Question

The maintenance technician in Nat Greene’s story didn’t start with a solution.

He started with observation.

He got curious.

He slowed down long enough to understand what was actually happening.

As leaders, we can do the same thing when it comes to developing our people.

Instead of immediately asking:

“How do I solve this?”

Perhaps we should first ask:

“What is really causing this?”

That’s often where clarity begins.

You’ll often discover you’re missing important information about the people on your team.

Maybe it’s a strength you haven’t recognized.

Maybe it’s a frustration that’s draining someone’s energy.

Maybe it’s a lack of confidence that’s causing a capable employee to avoid ownership.

Maybe it’s a misunderstanding between two team members that’s creating friction for everyone around them.

Whatever it is, you’ll never find it if you jump straight to solutions.

Just like the maintenance technician in Nat Greene’s story, leaders need to slow down long enough to understand what’s actually happening before they start fixing things.

When we take time to observe and pay attention to what’s happening at a deeper level with our people, we’re in a much better position to help them develop and grow.

Before you invest your energy solving the visible problem this week, spend a few minutes looking for the bolt.

You might discover that the real issue is much smaller, much simpler, and much more important than you first imagined.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

P.S. If you’re wrestling with a challenge in your business and aren’t sure whether you’re looking at the real problem or just a symptom, I’d be happy to help.
A Complimentary Clarity Coaching Session gives us 45 minutes to talk through what’s going on, explore possible root causes, and identify a practical next step.
You can schedule one here: GregHarrod.com/schedule.

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post The Problem Under the Problem appeared first on Greg Harrod.

I introduced myself and we began to talk.

Jen’s story is fascinating.

But the encouraging conversation that I’ll share more about in a moment almost didn’t happen.

Why?

For the same reason we can work beside our coworkers for weeks, months, even years without really getting to know them.

Why We Don’t Really Know Our Coworkers

You’ve likely read the same reports I have about how workers are feeling increasingly isolated and lonely in their jobs.

But you don’t need the studies to know that’s true.

Just take a moment to think about how current you are with what’s going on in the lives of your coworkers. Even those you’re closest to.

The guy on your team who told you a few weeks back that he and his wife are trying to sell their house. How’s that going for him and his wife? Have they had any offers? Are they discouraged about the progress? Or are they about to close and excitedly planning their move across town to their new home with the nursery for their first baby? Was it a boy or a girl they’re expecting?

How about the new woman who joined the team last month? (Or was it two months ago? Or three?)  How’s she doing?

And it’s not just our coworkers who are feeling disconnected. We have those feelings too.

When was the last time someone at work asked how your dad’s doing? Caring for an aging parent can be a long, hard path to walk and the mental burden doesn’t leave you just because you’re at the office.

Knowing a coworker cares about what you’re going through and sincerely wants to know how you’re doing can make those difficult days a little more bearable.

We all want that kind of support. And most of us want to offer it to others too.

So what gets in our way?

Just like Jen, we’re all in a hurry.

We’re hustling to get where we need to go and do what needs to be done.

The pace of business feels relentless.

And we’re all doing our best to keep up.

Moving quickly and efficiently is necessary and required to meet the obvious needs of our customers and our employees.

But as humans, our customers and our employees have another need that can sometimes go unseen and unmet.

We All Need Personal Connection

Every person has an innate need to be connected to other people.

We’re wired for relationship.

Personal connection strengthens us. This is true for the deep relationships we have with our families and dearest friends. And it’s true for the less intimate relationships with coworkers and even new acquaintances.

As an example, let’s go back to my experience with Jen last week.

My wife, Kiersten, and I had a booth at the Texas State Homeschool Convention in the Houston area. We were there to share our Beast to Blanket Fiber Arts Curriculum and build relationships for our Pemberley Woolworks business.

Jen was also an exhibitor there.

She’s a retired veterinarian who now writes a children’s book series called Rooster and Squid. And she’s a wonderful human being.

Kiersten and I were encouraged and energized by Jen even though we spent very little time with her.

We had that first conversation at our booth when she paused as she hurried by. After that we had a brief text message exchange and a few short chats as we passed in the hallway.

We didn’t have in-depth discussions about our deepest secrets.

We talked about our animals, our businesses, and our life journeys. And how our introverted selves couldn’t wait to sit down and have some quiet time to recharge for the next day of peopling.

The connection Kiersten and I made with Jen and the natural interactions we had with her encouraged and strengthened us as we were doing our work.

As I reflected on how that encounter came to be, I realized that we took several intentional steps that you can apply as a leader in your business to build connection and relationships with the people you work with.

3 Simple Steps You Can Take to Connect with Your Coworkers

1. Create a Welcoming Environment

Kiersten and I designed our booth to create an environment where people felt encouraged to pause and observe.

Kiersten spun wool into yarn with her spinning wheel continuously during the entire 3 days of the convention. (Yes, her level of skill and endurance is remarkable!)

She did this because people are mesmerized by the motion and mechanics of the process. They want to be still and watch her do her thing.

They also want to ask questions and have a conversation.

She gently smiles to communicate that she’s inviting them to interact with her.

Even though they’re on an urgent mission to visit all the booths on their list and have no time to spare, they find themselves pausing.

They relax just a little even though they’re surrounded by the noise and chaos of a huge exhibitor hall packed with hundreds of people.

They enjoy the moment and their heartbeat slows.

They connect with strangers as they chat about what they see.

Kiersten’s spinning creates a refreshing oasis experience for people.

You don’t have to have a spinning wheel at your desk to serve people this way in your business.

Maybe you’re the one who has the candy dish at your desk, where everyone in the office stops to get a treat in the middle of the afternoon and to hear the encouraging words you offer them every time they come by.

They say they’re there for the candy, but you know the human interaction you’re giving them is what they really value.

That candy you’re giving them costs you money, but those short chats require you to invest your time as well. And that’s an even more valuable asset.

So, it’s wise to be intentional about how you invest your time to build connections and relationships.

2. Use Your Calendar as a Tool for Connecting with People

If you’re like me, your calendar can get completely filled with activities that are focused on accomplishing tasks.

That’s good in the short-term for getting things done, but a packed schedule doesn’t allow time for building relationships with people.

And that takes time.

You have to spend time interacting with your coworkers to get to know them and support them.

Kiersten and I would not have met Jen, or the hundreds of other people we interacted with last week, if we hadn’t invested our time to be there. Or if we were working on our phones as they walked by our booth.

We had to intentionally schedule time to connect with people.

I encourage you to take a similar approach.

Build time into your schedule to make room for spending time with people.

That may look like scheduling one-on-ones with your direct reports or simply holding a few minutes every day to give you the time you need to talk with people who stop by to catch up.

Whatever approach you take, protecting your schedule so you can spend time connecting with your coworkers is a solid short and long-term investment.

Here’s another easy way to use your calendar as a tool to build relationships with people.

Set reminders so you can follow up on the events that are important in the lives of others.

When someone tells you their son is going off to college in a month and they’re anxious about it, set a reminder for that date so you can check in on them.

Remembering the first anniversary of a coworker’s loss can be an encouraging act of compassion for them as they move through the grieving process.

These are just a couple of practical ways to stimulate your thinking.

3. Be Curious

Finally, I encourage you to simply be curious and genuinely interested in learning about other people.

I am constantly amazed at how fascinating people are. And I’m equally amazed at how often we miss easy opportunities to learn about the interesting people around us.

Often it only takes one question to unlock a fascinating discovery about another person.

This happened time and time again last week at the convention.

I learned the details about Jen’s journey from a veterinarian to a children’s book author because I asked her to tell me more about what she was doing at the convention.

I discovered that one of the leaders of the convention was also a design engineering director for Lockheed Martin.

A data analyst from the UK told me how he works for a software startup company and has lived in 48 states with his wife, 3 kids, a dog and a cat.

A woman told me how she’s a podcast host, operates a print shop, and runs their farm with her husband after their military service.

I could go on and on with the life stories I heard last week.

These folks graciously shared their experiences with me and I’m grateful.

I hope they were encouraged as I listened to them.

You can have this same enriching experience for yourself and support your coworkers too.

Just invite them to share what’s going on in their lives and listen with genuine curiosity.

It really is that simple.

Since You Couldn’t Be at Our Booth Last Week

To close, I want to give you the opportunity to experience a little of what the visitors to our Beast to Blanket booth saw last week.

Here’s a short video of Kiersten at her spinning wheel.

You can see more on the Beast to Blanket website.

And I am sincerely interested in learning more about you and your life. I’d love to know how you would answer these questions.

What makes you unique as a person?

What kind of things are you into?

What do you like to do?

Shoot me a quick reply to one of those questions if you’re up for it. I read every email response myself and reply to as many as I can.

It would be a privilege to get to know you a little bit better.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post 3 Simple Ways to Build Stronger Connections at Work appeared first on Greg Harrod.

You may have someone on your team that comes to mind immediately.

You ask a clear question and you expect a clear answer.

Instead, you hear:

 “Well… it depends.”
 “I’m not completely sure yet.”
 “I can see a few different ways this could play out.”
 “There are other factors we should probably consider.”

Or you just get a long pause…

Meanwhile, someone else in the meeting gives an immediate answer with total confidence.

Think about your reaction to each person.
Which one did you trust more?

Who Should We Trust the Most?

If we’re honest, most of us instinctively trust the confident person more. And we appreciate the quick response that keeps the meeting moving.

The hesitant person can be frustrating.

Slow.

Hard to pin down.

Maybe even… wishy-washy.

Before you label that person indecisive, I encourage you to ask yourself this:

“What might they be seeing that I’m not?”

That question has changed the way I lead.

Because I’ve found that sometimes the problem isn’t indecision in the other person. The area for improvement is actually in me. It’s my own impatience and my lack of understanding of how some people are wired that’s causing my frustration.

Sometimes the person I’m being slightly annoyed by is processing complexity I haven’t fully recognized yet.

Learning to Value the Wait

I’ve learned that the some of the best answers are those that come more slowly.

For years, I assumed some people simply needed to:

• think faster
• be more decisive
• communicate more clearly
• stop overcomplicating things
• just make a decision and move forward for Pete’s sake!

And sometimes that’s true.

Some people genuinely do avoid ownership or commitment.

But that’s not always the case.

Sometimes what looks like hesitation is actually discernment.

You see two obvious choices. It’s clear and simple to you.

Their perspective is different.

They see unintended consequences, missing information, people dynamics, operational realities, timing concerns, or subtle assumptions nobody has challenged yet.

You think you’re choosing between A and B. It’s black and white.

They see the black and white too. And more shades of gray than they can count.

They’re noticing that A and B are both incomplete options.

Those are very different situations.

Which leads to an important leadership question:

Am I dealing with indecision?

Or…

Am I dealing with someone who is helping us think more clearly before we decide?

If you confuse those two things, you may shut down one of the most valuable perspectives on your team.

Fast Answers Are Not Always the Best Answers

One of the patterns I’ve noticed in the leadership teams I work with is that confidence often gets rewarded more quickly than thoughtful judgment.

The person who answers immediately sounds decisive.

The person who pauses sounds uncertain.

And the hectic pace of business can cause leaders to overvalue quick responses and actions.

But speed is not always evidence of wisdom.

And confidence and apparent clarity are not always as solid as they first seem.

Sometimes they’re evidence that someone is seeing only part of the picture.
What appears to be confidence and clarity on the surface may actually reflect an incomplete understanding of the situation.

The person slowing the conversation down may be helping the team avoid a costly blind spot.

That doesn’t mean every hesitant person is always right.

It also doesn’t mean teams should become paralyzed by analysis.

But it does mean wise leaders learn to distinguish between avoidance and discernment.

Those are not the same thing.

One Reason I Find Working Genius So Helpful

One of the reasons the Working Genius framework has been valuable to me is that it gives leaders a healthier way to interpret behaviors that are often misunderstood.

People with strong tendencies toward Wonder or Discernment are frequently the ones who:

• notice risks early
• recognize patterns
• ask difficult questions
• see complexity others miss
• hesitate to declare certainty too quickly

From the outside, that can look frustrating.

Inside their head, though, something very different is happening.

They’re trying to synthesize all the information they’re taking in so they can confidently recommend a direction.

And when leaders misunderstand that process, they often unintentionally shut down one of the most valuable perspectives in the room.

As a result, they miss the insight that is most important.

I’ve Had to Confront This in Myself Too

Part of why this topic matters to me is because I can be this person too.

My Working Geniuses are Enablement and Discernment, with Wonder not far behind.

So when I’m processing a situation, my brain naturally starts evaluating:

• patterns
• exceptions
• people dynamics
• operational realities
• downstream effects
• unintended consequences

Many times, I’m overthinking.

Other times, I’m noticing something important.

And honestly, when I’m in the middle of it, it can be hard to tell the difference.

There are moments where I genuinely cannot give a fast answer because I’m still sorting through what I believe is actually true.

That realization has helped me become less judgmental of others.

Especially people who don’t process decisions the same way I do. Some process more slowly than I do. Others process much faster.

How to Help Thoughtful People Contribute More Effectively

If you’d like to support those of us who can be “slow processors”, here are some suggestions.

1. Ask for their perspective directly

Many thoughtful people will not naturally fight for airtime in a meeting.

Especially if:

• they’re still processing
• someone more forceful is dominating the conversation
• they don’t yet have absolute certainty (which rarely comes for them!)

So invite them in directly.

Try something like:

“I have a feeling you may be seeing something the rest of us are missing. What concerns or considerations should we think through before we decide?”

That question changes the environment.

Now you’re not demanding immediate certainty.

You’re simply inviting them to share their insight.

Those are very different things.

2. Give them time to think before the meeting

Some people process externally. They like thinking out loud with a group.

Others process internally. Their preference is silent solitude.

The internally processing people often perform much better if they know ahead of time:

• where the tension or uncertainty exists
• what decision is being discussed
• what input is needed

Giving them a little preparation time can dramatically improve the quality of their contribution.

3. Stop forcing false either/or decisions

One of the most common leadership mistakes I see is this:

A leader unknowingly limits the conversation to two incomplete options.

Then they pressure the team to pick one quickly.

Thoughtful people often resist this because they see:

• missing information
• flawed assumptions
• or better alternatives that haven’t been explored yet

They tend to stay quiet and not share what they’re noticing.

And when the boss starts pushing hard for a decision right now, they definitely won’t open their mouth.

So instead of asking:

“Is it A or B?”

Try:

“Are A and B actually our best options, or are we missing something important?”

That small shift often produces much better thinking.

4. Learn the difference between delay and discernment

Not every pause is unhealthy and not every fast answer is wise.

Strong leaders learn to ask themselves:

• Is this person avoiding ownership?
• Or are they trying to protect us from overlooking something important?

Those require completely different leadership responses.

5. Don’t punish nuance

If every thoughtful contribution gets interpreted as:

• negativity
• resistance
• lack of confidence
• slowing things down
• “making things complicated”

Eventually your thoughtful people will stop speaking.

And once that happens, leadership teams become dangerously overconfident.

You don’t want a team that agrees quickly.

You want a team that thinks clearly.

Ideally you develop a team that does both. But that takes time and it’s rare.

Take Time to Pause Before You Label

Before you label someone indecisive, pause and stay curious. Ask what they may be noticing that you aren’t.

You’ll find that sometimes the issue really is overthinking and indecision.

But sometimes it isn’t.

Wise leaders learn how to tell the difference.
And often, that starts with examining their own assumptions before diagnosing the other person.

Because the goal isn’t simply faster decisions.

It’s clearer thinking and better decisions.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post Before You Label Someone Indecisive, Ask This appeared first on Greg Harrod.

What seemed like a simple question to me generated some interesting looks during a recent meeting I was in with a client.

(An anonymized client, of course, to maintain confidentiality.)

I was talking with the leadership team of a small, but operationally complex business.

And they didn’t really know how to answer the question.

It turns out that most of them were related or had been in the same class since kindergarten. So they couldn’t really remember a time when they hadn’t known each other.

I wasn’t surprised.

Many small businesses are like this.

The founders are married or have been best friends since high school or both. So, when their kid needs a job, she’s on the team. Or when that nephew who’s still trying to find his way in life is once again “between jobs,” that open role in the family business becomes a perfect fit.

Sometimes having family or lifelong friends in the same business works well. Sometimes it doesn’t.

And, in the case of the leadership team I was talking with, things were going great.

We were talking about their roles in the business and the types of work they truly enjoyed.

The more we talked, the more they learned about each other.

In fact, they were a little surprised to discover just how much there was still to learn about how to work together.

Because you can know a person for years and still not fully understand how to work together in a way that brings out the best in both of you.

I find that’s a common theme for the founders of small businesses and the leaders on their teams.

They’re Doing Well, But Want To Do Better as Leaders

In most cases, the leadership teams are functioning well and their businesses are growing. The market demand is strong and they’re making capital investments so they can serve their customers better.

But they aren’t satisfied with where they are as leaders. They know they can do better.

In fact, they know they MUST do better so their people can continue to thrive as their businesses grow.

That’s a big part of why they give me the privilege of being in these conversations.

They’re experiencing a reality that every leader who’s started and grown a business knows all too well.

When you grow your business, the gaps you have grow too.

Often with leadership teams, the gaps they first identify as the most important to address aren’t around what you might expect: supply chain disruptions, production constraints, or even getting and keeping good employees.

Of course, like every business, they face constant challenges in all those areas.

But the thing they say causes them the most pain is a fundamental skill we all struggle with: communication.

It shows up in different ways throughout our conversations when they say things like:

“In my head, I know what I want done, but I don’t do a good job of explaining it to others.”

and

“Information flow is a BIG problem throughout our organization.”

Their comments remind me of the Leadership Pulse Survey I did last year at the Wichita Industrial Trade Show.

Communication Is a Commonly Reported Problem

I asked business leaders at the show this question:

“If you could fix one problem with your team dynamics, what would it be?”

Sixty-eight (34%) of the answers had something to do with communication.

This isn’t surprising.

I suspect every leader in every business would say communication is one of their biggest challenges.

But the more I’ve thought about the conversations I’ve had with business leaders, I’ve realized something.

Communication problems are real, but they’re usually surface-level problems.

When you’re struggling to communicate well, your real challenge is almost always deeper than that.

At least that’s true for me.

The Deeper Challenges Below Communication Problems

My “communication” challenges are more accurately described as “understanding” challenges.

I don’t understand what I’m trying to say.
I can’t communicate my message clearly because I am not clear about it myself. When I begin to write it down, the fuzziness of my thinking is quickly exposed.

I don’t understand the person or people I’m communicating with.
Even if what I’m saying makes sense to me, I’m not sure how to express it in a way that’s effective and meaningful for the receiving party.

I don’t truly understand myself.
This is the understanding that is critically important to develop, but also the most elusive.

Why Understanding Oneself Is Critical to Communicating Well

It’s important for a leader to develop a clear message and deliver it in a way that resonates with their audience.

But the most effective leaders do more than that.

They ask themselves hard questions like:

“Why is this topic important to me?”

“What impact do I want to have on my team?”

“Am I willing to invest the time to communicate more clearly?”

These are the kinds of questions I’m challenging myself to answer in my own business.

Pondering deeper questions like these and wrestling with my honest answers is difficult, but necessary if I want to communicate well.

This increased self-awareness creates a stronger foundation for the messages I communicate. It also fuels my desire to better understand the people I get to share my life with: my wife, my family, my business partners, and my clients.

Clear understanding always comes before clear communication.

Simple Steps to Start Developing Better Understanding

You may be thinking this sounds great in theory, but impossible in your day-to-day reality.

Your business is running at a pace that barely gives you time to eat dinner with the family or say goodnight to your kids.

It feels like controlled chaos. And “controlled” may be stretching it.

The business leaders I spent time with are in similar situations.
And honestly, so am I.

Starting and scaling a business is demanding and can feel overwhelming at times.

And that’s exactly why I encourage you to follow the example of these leaders I told you about.

Here’s what they did.

A Short Conversation Can Have a Big Positive Impact

They invested about an hour to sit together as a leadership team and have an open, authentic conversation.

They had a short discussion that allowed them to get to know each other better, not only as unique individuals, but as coworkers.

The context was intentionally on how work gets done in their businesses.

They were focusing on how they do their best work as individuals and as a leadership team. And they were building a deeper understanding of themselves and one another so they could lead their people and their business more effectively.

They invited me into the conversation so I could facilitate the discussion from a more objective perspective. As the new guy in the room, I haven’t known them for years and I’m not an expert in their businesses, so I was naturally curious about them and the work they do. In several cases, they learned surprising things about each other simply by answering the questions.

And based on their comments as we wrapped up the sessions, I’m confident that even this one meeting produced a deeper level of understanding that will lead to better communication among themselves, with their teams, and throughout their organizations.

If you find yourself struggling with communication challenges in your business, you can do what these leaders did to make progress immediately.

3 Steps to Improve Understanding and Communication in Your Business

1. Schedule 45 minutes to an hour with your leadership team. If it’s not on your calendars, it won’t happen.
2. Invite someone to serve as facilitator so you can be fully engaged in the conversation.
3. Talk about how you do your best work and invite others to do the same. Focus on understanding each other and the impact this has on your business.

Let me know how your conversations with your leadership teams go. I’d love to hear how your experience is similar to or different than the folks I met with last week.

And if you’d like some support, I’d be happy to talk with you about how I can help.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

P.S. The easiest way to get on my calendar is to use my scheduling link. If none of those times work well for you, let me know. I’m sure we can figure out a time to connect.

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post Better Communication Starts with Better Understanding appeared first on Greg Harrod.

She can’t see what’s really going on with Monica and the rest of the people on her team, and it’s costing her time, money, and trust.

Favoritism, as Monica said she was experiencing, will do that.

That’s where we ended last week’s issue. You can catch the full story here if you missed it.

Now let’s go back to Ariel and her team.

One of These Things is Not Like the Others

Ariel’s a task-oriented leader who loves to drive things across the finish line. And she’s hired people who are wired like she is.

Ganesh, Leo, and Jim all get energy from seeing work get completed. They love to check things off their “to do” list.

Just like Ariel.

Naturally, the Working Genius map for Ariel’s team showed a cluster of people with the Working Genius of Tenacity.

But Monica was not in that group.

She doesn’t enjoy doing all the detailed tasks a project requires. And, frankly, she isn’t very good at it.

Tenacity is Monica’s Working Frustration not her Working Genius.

Take a look at the Working Genius map for Ariel’s team.

The red circles highlight areas of frustration while the green circles identify work that naturally energizes each person.

Monica reports to Ariel.
But she didn’t hire her.

Ariel “inherited” Monica when she stepped into her new role as the supervisor of the group.

And here’s what was happening.

Judgment and Eroding Self-Confidence

Instead of Ariel, and the rest of the team, recognizing that Monica adds value in different ways, they began to judge her.

It was obvious to everyone, including Monica, that she didn’t enjoy doing all the detailed work that’s required to complete a job. She did those things, but not as well as they did. And with much less enthusiasm.

So, Monica’s teammates began to think less of her.
And, sadly, Monica began to think less of herself.
She felt increasingly guilty about not performing at the same level as her coworkers when it came time to finish projects.

Monica was beginning to lose her confidence.

She didn’t say anything to Ariel about how she was feeling.

Her teammates didn’t share any of their thoughts about Monica with anyone either.

But they were there.

And what was slowly building below the surface started to come out as subtle, but very real, favoritism.

Unintended Favoritism

Monica stopped being included in important project discussions.

She would find out later that she hadn’t been invited to meetings she used to attend.

Monica didn’t mind missing those meetings. In fact, she hated listening to all the details about the specific action items and critical deadlines.

What bothered her was that no one told her why she was being left out.

So, she started to question whether she should stay with the company.
She began spending more time on LinkedIn.

That’s where she saw the Leadership Clarity Scorecard link on my profile and took the assessment.

Seeing What’s Really Going On

The Leadership Clarity Scorecard is another tool I offer to help leaders better understand and articulate what’s causing misalignment and friction for themselves and their teams.

Monica’s results told a predictable story.

Check out her response to this question:

“Most weeks, I spend more time in work that energizes me than work that exhausts me.”

She picked the most negative response: “Strongly Disagree”.

No wonder Monica was looking for a new job!

She was burning out.

Monica also felt like an outsider on Ariel’s team.

She felt pressure to be like Ariel.
And Ganesh.
And Leo.
And Jim.

But not like herself.

Monica didn’t feel the freedom to do the work she was built to do.

If you look closely at her answers to the other questions in the Personal Leadership Clarity section of the scorecard, you’ll see she has strong self-awareness. She knows what she’s designed to do. And she knows what drains her.

Monica’s problem wasn’t awareness.

The problem was that her environment didn’t allow her to work from her strengths.

So where was the disconnect?

Communication Gaps Make Leadership Heavy

Ariel didn’t know what Monica knew about herself.

And she didn’t know what kinds of tasks brought the other members of her team joy, energy, and fulfillment either.

That’s a big problem when you lead a team.

Ariel and the people on her team were working hard and they were delivering good results. But something still felt off.

They had areas of friction they couldn’t quite identify.
Their decision-making process was slower than it should have been.
And too much still depended on Ariel to push work forward.

They weren’t having open conversations as a team about who should be doing what to make the team most effective.

As a result, Ariel was feeling the weight of carrying work that her team should have been owning.

This is especially painful to think about because it was preventable.

Ariel created an environment that was slowly crushing her.

She did this unintentionally by continuing to do what she had always done as an individual contributor. And hiring people like herself.

A Common Error with Costly Consequences

This is common for new leaders and perfectly understandable. Ariel continued to do what made her successful and got her promoted.

But she didn’t see the problems she was creating.

She wasn’t aware that, if she’s not careful, she’s going to lose Monica.

That unintended favoritism Monica is feeling from Ariel is the reason she’s picking up the phone when the recruiters call.

And Ariel’s problem is even bigger than that.

Monica’s not the only one feeling this way.

Hunter is updating his resume too.

As the only member of the team with the Working Genius of Galvanizing, he’s also feeling underutilized and undervalued.

Ariel isn’t aware that her forced efforts to rally the team and get them moving in the right direction are falling flat.

She’s trying to hide her frustration when she’s doing this type of work, but it’s obvious she doesn’t want to be the group cheerleader.

Hunter, on the other hand, would love to be given the chance to fill that role. That’s what he’s built to do. And he’s really good at it.

But Ariel doesn’t know that about Hunter. Just like she doesn’t know how Monica is uniquely gifted.

That’s how small blind spots turn into expensive leadership problems.

If Ariel hadn’t seen what was actually happening with her team and acted on what she learned with these tools, this is what she would have been facing in just a few months.

She was going to get not one, but two resignation letters.

Monica and Hunter would have left and Ariel would have had two open spots to fill on her team.

And, as her recruiting costs were skyrocketing, she was going to once again be searching for candidates who are just like her instead of designing her job postings to match the gaps she has on her team but still couldn’t see.

I’ve seen it happen and can tell you it’s real. And it’s a shame because it doesn’t have to be that way.

Ariel had options.

If her situation hits a little too close to home for you, I invite you to consider them as well.

What You Can Do to Avoid the Negative Impacts of Favoritism

To prevent losing Monica and Hunter, Ariel could take her team through a Leadership Team Clarity Intensive workshop.

This interactive event eliminates miscommunication, reduces friction, and helps teams work together in a healthier, more aligned way.

If that doesn’t fit her budget, she could apply the Working Genius model on her own.

Or, at least start with a simple conversation with each of her team members to ask them what type of work they enjoy and what type of tasks drain them.

If she’s feeling brave, she could even invite them to share if they’re sensing any favoritism within the group. Or if they ever feel like outsiders.

Even small, courageous steps like this can bring out meaningful improvements in team cohesiveness and alignment.

Because when leaders and teams become aware of what’s really going on, they can turn diversity that was causing disconnect and isolation into an asset.

Awareness Brings Increased Productivity

Knowing and applying how each team member is built to do work will allow Ariel’s team to function more productively in all three phases of projects.

They’ll be strong from start to finish, not just in the final steps of implementation where Ariel and those who are wired like her do their best work.

Through an open conversation centered on discussing the team’s Working Genius team map, attitudes change. And unintentional favoritism goes away.

The discussion isn’t about who’s doing work the right or wrong way.

It’s focused on how work gets done and who is built to do certain types of tasks.

As a result, that conversation doesn’t feel like a personal attack to anyone.

Those who aren’t wired the same way as the boss are seen as just as valuable as those who are.

In fact, team members like Monica who had been looked down on by others are often seen as even more important because they fill gaps the others can’t.

But without the insight gained by the personal Working Genius assessments and the team map, leaders don’t see what’s going on.

Like Ariel, they remain unaware.

So they lose talented people who could make their team even better if only given the chance.

What’s Next for You?

I’m curious about the thoughts you’re having as you consider this story of Ariel, Monica, and the rest of the team.

Who do you relate to the most?

Are you, like Monica, experiencing what seems like favoritism and feeling like an outsider on your team?
Or do you find yourself wondering if you’re in Ariel’s situation, with your team members looking for other opportunities and you don’t even know it?

Either way, here’s the good news.

Even by thinking about it, you’re becoming more aware of your team dynamics.
And you still have time to make corrections if you need to.

If you’re not sure what the best next step is for you, I’d be happy to talk through it with you.

Use this link to schedule a Complimentary Clarity Coaching Session with me then take the Leadership Clarity Scorecard assessment.

The session is a free 45-minute call to help you talk through the challenges you’re facing, review your Scorecard results, and get clarity about your next leadership step.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post What Team “Favoritism” Often Reveals Beneath the Surface appeared first on Greg Harrod.

You’ve been an individual contributor your entire career and you just got that promotion you’ve been working hard for.

Congratulations!

Welcome to being a supervisor…
and to tricky situations like this one involving Monica, your direct report.

What Do I Do with This?

Monica was recently asked, “If you could fix one problem with your team dynamics, what would it be?”

And she quickly responded with one word:

“Favoritism”

Having your team member say something like that can be more than a little unnerving, even for a veteran leader of people.

What makes a situation like this difficult isn’t just what Monica said.

It’s that most leaders don’t actually know what to do with it.

What would you do if you were her?

As you consider your answer, let me give you an even harder question:

What is favoritism, really?

Before I share more about Ariel and Monica, I want to make it perfectly clear that they are NOT real clients. Their names and details of their situations are anonymized to respect their privacy.

However, the reality of their predicament is as real as it gets.

Favoritism Can Take Many Forms

Let’s dig deeper into Monica’s honest, one-word answer because “favoritism” can take many forms and can be driven by a variety of factors for all of us.

I wish this wasn’t the case, but I’m susceptible to showing favoritism.

Sometimes it’s for self-serving reasons like:

• Career advancement – If I treat this person right, they’ll help me get the position I want.
• Perks – That person will give me access to special things I can’t access on my own.
• Glory – By gaining their favor, I’ll be in the spotlight and look important.

Maybe you can relate.

We all have to deal with the temptation to treat some people better than others.

Some reasons we unintentionally favor certain people are more subtle.

For instance, I can sometimes show partiality to folks because they’re like me.

I work to prevent this, but you might get preferred treatment from me if any of these describe you.

• Grew up in a small, rural community – bonus points if you’re from Kansas
• Attended Kansas State University (or a similar land-grant university)
• Have a dry sense of humor and can deliver a high-quality Dad Joke
• Spent your career in manufacturing or a trade/service business
• Share my values, worldview, and belief system

I know those are things that draw me to a person and these factors can cloud my objectivity when I’m building and leading a team.

If I’m not diligent and intentional, I’ll surround myself with people like me and miss out on the benefits of having a team with diversity across a wide range of factors.

In other words, I have to pay close attention to not show favoritism.

We can all let our comfort with the familiar overly influence our decision-making and our actions.

That was the case for Ariel.

She was walking into a trap that’s present for all leaders.
And most leaders never see it.
Until it’s too late.

A Hidden Trap for Leaders

We all tend to naturally show favoritism to those who do work like we do.

As a result, we end up building a team made up of people who are much like us.

They are good at and enjoy doing the same type of tasks we do.

Sometimes it’s intentional and obvious.

It’s easy to spot those work environments when you hear a leader say something like this:

“This is how we do things when you’re on my team. We get things done. We make decisions fast and we take action. We don’t spend time with our head in the clouds daydreaming and wondering or wasting time in brainstorming sessions. We’re doers. That’s how I work and that’s exactly what I expect from every person on my team.”

If you’re in a business or a department led by someone like that, you either fit in because you’re wired like the leader, or you don’t.

And you will certainly be favored by the boss when you do things his way.

But, if you don’t, things will probably not go well for you.

For instance, if you add the most value to a business by doing the upstream ideation work activities (like time-wasting brainstorming sessions…), you’re likely not going to feel respected and appreciated when you’re working for a leader like this.

Or, more likely, you may never be put in that position.

Because you would never get hired.

Favoritism During and After the Hiring Process

When leaders aren’t aware that every work endeavor moves through six steps from start to finish and that they need people who perform well and enjoy doing tasks in every one of those six stages, they leave gaps in their teams unfilled.

When they have an open position, they don’t consider these gaps and seek out someone who is built to do the type of work that’s not getting done.

Instead, they do what comes naturally.

They look for someone like themselves.

Someone who thinks like they do.
Deals with people like they do.
Solves problems like they do.

Those are the candidates they favor in the interview process.

Usually, this favoritism is subtle and goes unchallenged.

But it’s there. And it doesn’t end when the onboarding process is over.

Partiality is felt by those who are not quite as close a match to the boss as others on the team are.

Because they’re committed high performers, they complete those tasks that everyone else enjoys, but it quickly sucks the energy out of them.

When others feel energized and enthusiastic, they feel completely drained.

So they feel like an outsider.

Sadly, in situations like this where a leader has built a team made up primarily of clones of themselves, they truly are an outsider.

I see this show up clearly when I’m helping clients see what’s really going on in their teams.

Next week I’m going to come back to Ariel, Monica, and the rest of their team to dive deeper into their team dynamics.

Their Working Genius team map will help us see what’s really causing Monica to feel the way she does.

And, we’ll uncover why she’s started picking up the phone when the recruiters call her and why she’s not the only one spending more time on LinkedIn.

Ariel has big problems, and she doesn’t even know it.

But it’s not all doom and gloom for this first-time supervisor. She’s taking advantage of resources that will reveal what she’s not yet seen and protect her from losing key team members.

Until then, I invite you to consider these three questions so you can avoid being in the tight spot Ariel’s in. (And, yes, that was in fact an intentional reference to one of my favorite O Brother Where Art Thou lines, just in case you were wondering.)

3 Questions to Protect You and Your Team from Favoritism

To prevent you and your team members from suffering the negative effects of intentional or unintentional favoritism, I encourage you to take a moment to reflect on these questions.

1. Do I invite all of my team members to tell me the kinds of work they do and don’t enjoy and seek to understand how they’re each wired?
2. Am I making an intentional effort to get to know every person who reports to me, especially those I don’t naturally connect with?
3. What’s one action I can take this week to protect myself from showing favoritism?

I hope you find those questions helpful in your quest to be a more effective leader in your business.

If this discussion of favoritism has raised any concerns and you’d like a sounding board to have a private, safe conversation about what you’re dealing with, feel free to schedule a complimentary coaching session with me using this link.

I’ll help you think through things so you can get better results with your existing team as you see what’s really going on under the surface.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post The Hidden Leadership Trap Behind “Favoritism” appeared first on Greg Harrod.

You’d think that the most vivid memory I have from that experience would be George’s explanation of the world-shaking protests that occurred there just a few years earlier.

But it’s not.

George was doing an outstanding job as our tour guide. He was knowledgeable, engaging, and clearly experienced. He was answering questions (in a very tactful, diplomatic manner as you’d expect in his position.)

But I really don’t remember any of his answers.

What I remember is this.

The green stuff in his front teeth.

It was right there for the world to see. Very distracting.

And there was nothing I could do about it.

With the language barrier, I couldn’t think of a discrete, polite way to say, “Hey George… you might want to check a mirror.”

So, we all stood there. Listening. Nodding. Pretending not to notice.

But of course, we noticed. Who wouldn’t?

I couldn’t help wondering which Chinese vegetable got lodged in George’s teeth.

Do they have spinach here? Was that parsley maybe? Some foreign-to-me leafy green?

Focused on George’s message I was not.

And I look back and think about how uncomfortable this situation was for me. But not for George.

Because he had no idea.

And that highlights a lesson from this story that’s important for leaders.

When you can’t see something about yourself…
you also can’t see what it’s doing to your team.

The Leadership Version of That Moment

We all have a version of that.

It’s not spinach (or whatever form of vegetation George had been munching on) in our teeth. Most of the time anyway.

It’s those habits, tendencies, and patterns that are obvious to everyone else but invisible to us.

They’re the things we do that distract the people around us and unintentionally slow them down.

Our blind spots aren’t character flaws. We all have them.

But in leadership, this matters more than we realize.

Because the issue isn’t that we do things that make our team less effective.

The issue is when we’re unaware of them.

And when we’re unaware, we don’t adjust.

We keep doing the same thing, in the same way, expecting a different outcome.

A Simple Way to Think About It

There’s a simple framework called the Johari Window.

This diagram explains the concept.

There are things you know about yourself.

There are things others know about you.

And there are things others can see that you can’t.

That last category is the one that causes the most friction when you’re trying to get work done in your business.

A leader might think:

“I’m decisive.”

But the team experiences:

“He doesn’t listen.”
“She rushes decisions.”

It’s the same behavior but different people have different experiences and interpretations of the leader’s actions.

That gap is where friction starts.

Most of the time, leaders don’t see the friction clearly.

They just feel it.

Something’s off…

but they can’t explain why.

And, too often, their people don’t feel comfortable entering into a conversation about what they’re noticing and experiencing.

The behaviors that could be openly discussed and easily corrected go unmentioned.

Like George’s leftover bits of his lunch in his teeth.

Why Blind Spots Create Friction

People typically don’t struggle with your weaknesses.

They struggle with your lack of awareness of them.

If I say:

“I’m not great at follow-through. I’m working on it.”

People adjust. They help. They give grace.

But if I believe I’m excellent at execution while consistently dropping things, people don’t know how to respond.

It creates confusion.

And over time, that confusion turns into frustration.

Not because of what I can’t do.

But because of what I don’t see.

Why Self-Awareness Isn’t Enough

We hear this advice all the time.

“Be more self-aware.”

That sounds good, but it’s incomplete.

Because you can’t discover a blind spot by yourself.

If you could see it, it wouldn’t be a blind spot.

So the question becomes:

How do we actually see what we can’t see?

And maybe just as important…

how do we create an environment where people feel safe enough to tell us?

This is why so many leaders end up guessing.

They see the symptoms, but they don’t recognize the underlying pattern that’s causing them.

A Better Lens for Understanding Your Team

I use tools like the Six Types of Working Genius to help leaders see these patterns more clearly.

This gives you a way to see how work actually flows across your team.

We identify where ideas get stuck, where decisions slow down, and where execution breaks down.

Applying this model helps you and your team thrive, because it’s built around knowing the type of tasks you’re wired to do.

You’ll see what kinds of work give you energy and what drains you.

And you’ll discover something most leaders don’t see on their own.

It’s one of the most common blind spots leaders have:

Believing something is a strength when it’s actually a frustration.

This is where they’re forcing it.

We tend to confuse competence with fit.

Just because you can do something well doesn’t mean it’s where you do your best work.

And when you spend too much time in areas that drain you, it shows up.

It affects your tone, your level of patience, and how you interact with your team.

I’ve seen leaders say:

“I’m great at driving results.”

But the team experiences pressure and micromanagement.

Or:

“I’m highly collaborative.”

But the team experiences slow decisions and lack of clarity.

The issue isn’t effort.

It’s misalignment between how I see myself and how others experience me.

The Conversation That Changes Everything

Blind spots don’t shrink through reflection alone.

They shrink through open, vulnerable conversations.

The kind that sounds like:

“Can I share something I’ve noticed?”
“You may not see this, but here’s how it lands for us.”
“You say this energizes you, but we’re experiencing something different.”

Those are not always easy conversations.

But they are the ones that create real change.

Because they move something from unknown to you…

to known by both of you.

These conversations don’t just help you see yourself more clearly.
They help you stop guessing so you can see what’s actually happening with your team.

You’ll discover things like where work is getting stuck, where people are misaligned, and where you’re carrying more than you should.

And once something is out in the open, it can be addressed.

Why This Builds Trust

There’s a fear here for a lot of leaders.

If I admit I’m not good at something, will I lose credibility?

If I say I don’t really enjoy parts of my job and have to force myself to do certain things, will I be looked down on?

In my experience, the opposite happens.

When people know what you’re great at and where you struggle, they actually respect and trust you more.

They feel the freedom to talk more openly with you and to offer help more quickly when they see you need it.

But when they think you’re unaware, they go quiet.

And when people go quiet, problems don’t get solved.

They just stay hidden and they get worse.

A Simple Next Step

You don’t need a full Working Genius assessment to get started.

Just try this.

Ask yourself:

Where might I be overestimating my strengths?

Where might others experience me differently than I think?

Then ask someone you trust:

“What’s something you’ve noticed but I may not be seeing about myself?”

And when they answer,

Don’t defend.
Don’t explain.
Just listen.

Doing that can be more powerful than you might expect.

You’ll demonstrate that you sincerely want to see what you’re missing. You want to grow as a person and as a leader. You want to get better.

Your humility and vulnerability will establish a pattern for your team to follow.

And mutual trust and respect within your team will build, along with their performance and results.

What You Can’t See

I’ve found that most leaders don’t need more advice.

They need better visibility into how work is actually getting done (or not getting done) with their teams.

They need a way to see what’s really happening, so they can make better decisions about what to fix.

The goal isn’t perfect self-awareness. We’ll always have our blind spots.

What makes leaders and the teams they lead function at the highest levels is much simpler than that.

The key is to create a culture where people feel the freedom to share what they see and you don’t.

When you do that, be prepared.

You may have someone stop you mid-sentence to suggest you take a quick trip to the restroom mirror.

And you might want to take your toothbrush with you.

Helping you lead with clarity and confidence,

Greg

Greg Harrod

Greg Harrod is a Business Coach and Strategic Communications Partner. Follow GregHarrod.com to learn how you can build clear communication, aligned teams, and simple rhythms so your business runs smoothly. Greg will help you learn how to go from daily firefighting to calm, confident leadership by sharing his 30+ years of experience leading teams and businesses.

A quick note about affiliates

Some of the pages on my website contain affiliate links to products, apps, and services. If you click through and purchase, I may receive a commission on the sale and you pay no more. My policy is to only affiliate with products and services that I believe will provide value to you. 

The post The Thing Your Team Sees That You Don’t appeared first on Greg Harrod.